How to love without the dilemma and drama of love ?
When love comes from a place of grounding and calmness you are in peace , when you love and you feel needy , greedy controlling ( you are not loving ) you are possessing .
Love does not know possession … When you love you let go you relax in confidence
It is easy to do that isn’t it ?
Of course not , it is far from easy
It requires practice , patience with one self but more important it require awareness
Awareness that the baggage that we attach to love has nothing to do with love it self ..
Most people thinks to the roles ( social games ) they have to play when they are in love …he or she has to do That for me , I have to do that for him ……etc
In love you don’t have to do any thing , in love you grow in fulfilling your inner calling , when you feel the inner calling To say or do something you just go ahead and you do it
Love based mentality , does no expect something from the other person when you love him , you don’t demand any thing from him , you just carry on with your feelings not expecting anything in return.
When you demand something for the exchanging of ?what you did to the other , that is not love ; ?That is ?a business transaction .
Love versus the selling of love
Media , TV , advertisement agencies are concerning by how to CAN LOVE in a box any box and sell it to you , that how ?they induce ?dependency ?in love …
If he loves me , he will bring me x,y,z ..
If he love me he will be able to do such part for me
For three weeks now he did not bring me any gifts .
Fill in the blanks …
….
….
….
Don’t get me wrong giving and receiving gifts are always amazing to increase the power of love only when it is done with ?pure intention and without expecting something in return
How to know you are living in love ( the real one ) not in the business of love ?
– You don’t ?get angry when your lover does not give or bring you what you expected ?
– You feel relaxed and at ease with your partner position toward your points of view , you don’t ?seek his/ her approval for your input and still hold to your love to ?him / her .
– You don’t regret what you did for that
person even if the relationship did not turn out as you expect or want .
So back to the first question ; how to love without that dilemma ?
- Engage yourself in relationships that reflect who you are not the relationships that cover what you miss in life
- Be self contained regardless of your status of relationship
Remember love is a verb ( action ) however the action follows the Being . - Ask your self the following question : would the love of this person makes me love my self more / get / accept / be ok with my self more ? If the answer to that questions is yes , then ?you are not in love ? you are dependent on the feeling that this person gives you .
I like so much, the way you think about roles in love, it isnt far easy, I agree, :
– action has to follows being so but I keep your way for 2014
Thanks a lot, for so much awareness and maturity of mind….but what’s life without passion ?
Dear Clement ,
Thanks for your input 🙂
Life without passion is not life , it’s mechanical processing
Some people feels misuse of passion they are better off without it ( I personally adapted such mentality at some point in my life ) those people might feel they can live securely and peacefully when not to give power to the passion , what they don’t understand is they are not living at all .
Passion ( when it is from the heart not from the ego ) is pure , overwhelming and is the energy to carry on your life , however when passion is dependent or driven from the Ego it starts to creat attachments and pain , ego driven passion is needy
Some questions might rise from what I just mentioned like :
– how to differentiate between pure passion and ego driven one ?
– how to protect myself by not making the wrong decision when i am driven by pure passion ( ex like staying in a company too much , or staying in a relationship with an abusive person ,….etc ) ?
– what to do if I am unable to discover my passion in life or in relationships ?
– what to do if I am not able to live my passionate life after I discover what I want
I think I will have to write about that soon 🙂
Islam
I like it, it is so simple,focused and helpful.
It will be highly appreciated if you could differentiate between the first and last bullet points which are under the below question:
So back to the first question ; how to love without that dilemma ?
What’s the different between” Engage yourself in relationships that reflect who you are ” and ” would the love of this person makes me love my self more / get / accept / be ok with my self more ?”
Thank you for such Lights!
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